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Write Your story. |
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Dear Member:
You can write your Success story in ParsDating... |
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| 04/05/2007 |
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| I just want to say thanks for the facilities you h... |
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Should love come before or after marriage?
Post date: 2006-12-11
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Why would you marry someone you didn't love?
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Love should come before marriage. The problem is that many people mistake love for lust.
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You should have a loving, healthy stable relationship with someone for at least a year before you decide to get married.
Do you respect, trust, and are concerned for eachother? Is there no abuse, drug problems or infidelity occuring?
Do have the same views on life? Do you have the same beliefs in religion or atheism and character values? Do you share many hobbies?
Does the other person's way of living not anger you or greatly annoy you?
Does separation not affect your relationship? Do you still feel attached to them, and not bored as time passes? Do you both deal with finances responsibly and not overspend or waste money?
Do you liker eachothers' family? Do you have the same attitude towards your own family? Do you get along generally with eachother's friends?
Do you agree whether or not to have kids, or how many children to have? Do you agree on how your children would be raised?
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Physical love usually comes before marriage, but to truly love someone only comes after a long relationship. After years of marriage, if your spouse still gives you goose bumps and you look at them and think you are the luckiest person in the world to be married to them... well, you get the idea!
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all these conditions on compatibility,ie. respect,politics. it,s aload of crap, people should marry if they enjoy each others company and enjoy having sex with each other,all these other things may come together after years of marriage, but don,t bank on it. I have been married 10 years and its had its ups and downs but the ups have easily outwayed the downs. Being a man i have found that a woman will forgave your faults if you show her plenty of loving.
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Before...DUH! Hopefully you are not forced or pressured into one of those sad "arranged marriages" where women are third class citizens.
If someone got pregnant, and both are not in love, DO NOT GET MARRIED!! You'll only get divorced later and take more time away from each of your lives to find that right person and your kid will grow up watching two miserable people and think that's what a marraige is supposed to be.
If you are not in love with a person wanting to marry you, DON'T DO IT! That's cheap.
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Love, HA HA! Who can call it. Apparently the "love" part of marraige should be after marriage, if at all. Marriage is a legal agreement, a contract, you dont have to love your job, just do it for the paycheck.
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depends...is this an arranged marriage? LOL
last I heard, love should come before marriage...after all; that's the reason you want to get married....
but I have also heard (and seen) couples get married to buy property...lol..like cars and a house....why? I do not know. Stupid I guess....very.
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"Love" has different definitions for different individuals... What can be seen as love for one, someone else wouldn't understand it. No one in this universe is able to give advice on love. Whether they get paid for it or not, the science of love has (in my opinion) never been solved... There is no equation, no formula to love.
Marriage is something invented by human beings, priests, religious leaders to unite two people together. Historically, this would mean that these same people would more than likely forge a family (remember the days where priests would show up at your door to ask you to procreate?). All this would mean more people in the parish, therefore more "mula"...
I'm not married yet, however, my girlfriend and I will be getting married in the near future...
The celebration of the wedding is not about feeling secure about our love for each other, it's not about religion and it's not about money. It's simply to celebrate our love for each other with our friends and families in one place. A big gathering.
Good luck!
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"Before! Hopefully you are not forced or pressured into one of those sad "arranged marriages" where women are third class citizens"
Unfortunately the above has been proven incorrect millions of times in the Western world after people from countries with arranged marriages (eg, India) have moved to Canada, USA, UK ETC and remained married for the balance of thier lives - often decades after they land here.
Therefore, marriage is ultimately the upbringing and cultural conditioning of 2 people. The facts simply do not support "third class citizen" theories often heard from Womens Studies students indocterinated with incorrect information.
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